Is Social Ventures Australia the beast?

This post is to speak my truth about my experience as a so-called Social Entrepreneur.  I am a  Maori Woman who cares about her community in Australia and in New Zealand, my roots.

I’ve had tears today, meeting the Business Angels and it’s been one of those weeks where ppl say through words or actions you can’t do it! But, my Spirit & mind shows me this is what you will be doing! my heart says this is why you’ll be doing it! and my actions say I am doing it already!

 In the meeting today with many new developments to share as it’s been a few months since I’ve seen them last and I guess it all came as a bit of a shock what I’m up to now for some. I was wearing my heart on my sleeve still absolutely elated from the design work I received from UTS yesterday and got hammered…Also, Two Angels weren’t there which changed the dynamics completely giving others voices untempered by what is right and good for me…..being in this position I think if I was any younger I would’ve succumbed to anything they wanted and been controlled and possibly change, impacting my authenticity and right to be my genuine self.

So many developments: I was able to answer their questions however a bit rushed and not as clearly as some would have liked,  I guess I took for granted how far I’d moved on since we last met and needed to present those movements first.  The natural flow of our meetings tend to go:  Jackie: this is where I’m up to,  Angels: Questions, answers, feedback, advice & support.  This time it was Jackie: I’d like to show you a presentation from UTS Design Students (presentation starts and the new name comes up ***** Foundation and I have to quickly explain the business structure I’ve decided to go with) thats where things went awry!  Then I had to give them an update as to where everythings up to in the project and I guess the legalists in the room could see how much I have to do and how is she going to do it.  Organisation, PHD, etc etc

 ”Who do you think you are?  You must think a PHD drops out of the sky?”  the gift of perception is a  tough bitch when it speaks like that…..a qualifying/ controlling spirit says to anyone with an audacious vision who dares to step out of the mould, status quo and has the audacity to give it a go: What gives you the right to do this, who do you think you are to do this, don’t you know who you’re talking to?  My actions say, I’ve heard it all before, all my life and here I am sitting amongst you with my heart open, willing to learn, listening to feedback , genuine about my vision  and determined to do it.

 For those of us willing to break out of the status quo by dreaming big and with the audacity to actually give it a go…..remember why you do it, the purpose, remember what matters the most, your priorities and take the pearls out of the bullshyt that comes; learn to discern straight to the heart of the matter, what’s really going on?  who is this person?  Where are they at?  what shapes their thought processes? their history?  their issues? I say that because there are times when people speak from their own experiences and put their face on you….they believe the giants they faced are the same giants you’ll face too.  You have to remember: each of us comes with a particular skillset and gift mix which makes us uniquely gifted and equipped with everything we need believe it or not to fulfill our life purpose.  We have to remember that we are the ones with the vision, we know what we see, we know what we know, no one has walked in our shoes but us…be wise and listen for what you need and take the opportunities discarding the rest.  Have compassion for people and where they’re at because you simply don’t know what they’re going through in their own lives…….believe it or not I gained alot today…..

Each of us has the responsibility for our own actions: the ambivalence of language gives us a choice to cut to the heart of people with our words alone, which can do irrevocable damage if not hurt or mindf##$$k someone with superlatives and how do you block the blow that comes from words spoken??  Make sure you guard your heart because out of it flows the wellspring of life and you want that to be a peaceful wellspring and not polluted by someone elses $#*@!! 

I was reminded some want me to tell them what they need to know in a language they understand- key facts…Social Ventures Australia Style because they always make sure they have the greatest presenters when they speak…..sudden thoughts entered my mind of a one man band, thank God I know myself ….  I’ve been kindly offered a one day course so I can learn how to communicate effectively to 4 different personality types at $700 it will help me in presenting my pitch to prospective funders……..Opportunity, so I graciously accepted.  

I wonder? Is SVA going to be the beast for Social Entrepreneurs like myself who have a project and just want to get it done but they’re developing a model of how to pitch that Business Angels will come to expect, the private funders they work with will expect from those of us on the ground and where will our Authenticity come in all of this as we’re told how to speak, think and act!  a way of doing things in which we’ll all have to live up to in order to do a job well done!  @#!*# That! I am who I am, I will do this project regardless of contacts or not, Angels or not, SVA or not, Uni’s or not, well-connected or not…… I think this is my journey and I’m grateful for the Angels input…yes, they’ve helped me with advice but no one spiritual or physical has the right to hinder or hold me back from my Life Purpose & Vision to help others.  I was grateful for “the Archer” because she believed in me, she heard my vision and shared her wisdom on how I could do it  and provided the opportunity of personally introducing me to a contact!  She was the balance in the mix today……That is a fine example of how it should be done!  For those in the position of funding consider this:  you are invited to partake in the vision of an individual to help others – do what you can to listen to the heart of the presenter no matter what form that comes in, you support by believing in them (that alone speaks volumes) by hearing them and asking questions to make sure you’ve got it right don’t hinder them with your legalistic attitude or superlatives they can’t understand because you will be a stumbling block and should be quickly uninvited from the process.

Do you really want to know why I do this??  Breakthrough for my life and for my family…..not just my immediate family but extended too – my eyes and heart are on my hapu/ sub-tribe back home in New Zealand….I’m learning to break new ground and grow!!!!  All it takes is one to break through…..I learn as much as I can to help my community but my first community is where I come from!!  People will be shocked if they knew I’ve been working on a business proposal for running a social enterprise back home too…….as well as what I’m doing here BUT that’s a typical Maori they are always thinking of the wider family and how they can help others get ahead…..

It was a significant day today because earlier this week I had a vision in which I had pulled myself up over the rocks and stood at a cave mouth elated I had made it this far…..I was looking at the clouds below and an eagles nest with three eggs in it (eagles have two eggs) and I was given special permission to take one….After the meeting I went to my Ngapuhi/ American Indian friend & she’s seen how far I’ve come since arriving here 7 yrs ago and I was gifted an amazing blue thunderegg (1 of 3 in her collection) that she’s had for over 20yrs and it still has a gold butterfly on it that her now adult daughter put there as a child.  Oftentimes it will be the people you least expect that will honor you and celebrate your achievements with you along the way,no matter how big or small.  I continued to celebrate how far I’ve come by a walk holding hands talking wit my daughter and the flowers she picked for me on the way home from dinner mean’t much more than anything else.

Alistair SSE CEO UK inspired me for the second time with the story of Michael Young…do you know part of his headstone says “Social Visionary and Innovator”(I think that’s incredible!)  he found solutions to problems that would benefit society……he built organisation after organisation to make them a reality and people told him all the reasons why he couldn’t do it, he’d go away and find solutions and come back until they said yes, it will work!  I told someone I want to be like Michael Young who started SSE UK and was told “you can’t do that because you’re not well connected and you don’t have contacts like he did, do you know what I mean?”he said and then continued ”it’s like Steve Lawrence started WorkVentures and played a key role in the set up of over 13 organisations such as SVA and bought SSE here to Australia – he can do that because he’s well connected.  Yeah, I wanted to be like him too I said lol I know who I am and it’s my personality to want to build things, solve a problem, find solutions, help the people, social justice, joy for all generations, leave a positive legacy for our next generations, innovation, creation – I’m not saying by any means I am these two amazing men what i’m saying is I am passionate about rebuilding peoples lives, removing what hinders them from living their life purpose because I know what it feels like to be held back and I’m willing to continue to perservere until I see the vision come to pass and make it happen….

There are things I want to set up to help my family, community and others get ahead in life and not be held back just because somebody thinks it can’t be done!!!  That’s their attitude not mine and I’m sick and tired of people putting their shyt on me…..know I’m going to do it and back me or back off!